May 17, 2013 Blog Dare Prompt – I felt so dizzy

Dizzy. My thoughts turned to hot flashes as well as several other symptoms of menopause that I now deal with at a somewhat early age. My symptoms made themselves known around seven to ten years ago, so while I am ‘used’ to it, I’m still not used to it. I truly believe that this feat may be quite the impossibility, but somehow you learn to live with it I guess because you actually have no choice as it is a part of life…which can be cruel at times…but like many other life changes that are much worse than what is natural, we still deal with it.

This poem can be read in several different ways ie., reading the entire poem at once, or reading only the first lines, or reading only the second lines. I used hot flashes as my muse, but the words as you’ll see will take on their own meaning for each reader such as any type of disorder that causes dizziness (as in my easily triggered but slight vertigo attacks), but also along the lines of emotions. Anyway, I hope you like it!

I felt so dizzy

 that night

The burning heat inside

was just too much

Incontinent

this time

I tried

  my best

Apparently

to no avail

Struggling

to call for help

But forced silence prevented

the words

Sadly, helplessly

they never escaped

Parched lips slightly apart

nothing being said

With only shallow labored breath

darkness as an envelopment

Like the waves of the sea

began to rise up

Before my very eyes

despite the cup of coolness

Beholden by another

through all attempts to quench

My flame

it blazed on

Continually

as if there were no aid

Calling a cease-fire

nevertheless

It went unheard

I was felled

By the black sword of darkness

into nowhere

This was the aftermath

in the midst of true fear

For all

that I

Would be no more but

suddenly, softly

Comes the light

returning to life

Again; I am

graciously…

Thankfully…

Conscious

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Aside

Poem #5 – The Fog

The sun hides behind the clouds

I have not seen a fog so thick in years

Though I can see clearly in front of me

I wonder if my brain still resides behind my ears

 

I yell to my family that dinner will be ready soon

Baked chicken and sautéed veggies covered in melted provolone

Just as I am ready to set the table

I realize that I never turned the oven on

 

Relaxing on my sofa, I see that nothing good is on the tube

Maybe now I can finish the novel that I started on last week

But as I make my way down the hall and open my bedroom door

I have absolutely no idea of what it was that I intended  to seek

 

I know full well that my brain still exists

It still resides exactly where it was yesterday

Hopefully tomorrow will be somewhat clearer

As I walk through the fog that is changing my life’s way

 

 

 

 

 

 

Aside

Ode to a Hot Flash

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?

I think not…summer is as winter compared to thee and thy way.

Morning dawns with thee…a heavy sear brands my heart;

How long shall it be ’til us do part?

The noon day sun glistens as ice over the sea;

as thy flame alone stokes, arising in me.

I have not yet found the cup that shall quench;

nor slightly soothe the scorch of thy strength!

Eve long endures, to suffer be my dwelling tent;

But lo, thou showest mercy to cease –  if only for a moment.

Softly, quiet,  night falls… slumber  escapes yet again;

Thy abrupt return as a flash – Woe, thou hinderest me to stand!

My threshold exceeds no better way than to abide;

From thee is nowhere to run, for certain nowhere to hide.

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?

I think not – summer is as winter compared to thee and thy way.

Ode to a hot flash…

Aside

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